Do you use etiquette books?

[*heather*]

I'm curious if any of you own or refer to etiquette books, not just in wedding planning, but in every day life? I have several, and probably couldn't live without them. But I see that traditional etiquette is falling by the wayside. What do you think?

[lizaanne]

I love to collect really old ones, I think I have three now. I love to read about the proper way for young couples to date, how to address people properly, how to entertain in the home, setting the table, and stuff like that.

The modern ones really get me irritated so I don't read them. I think society is becoming too lazy and lax when it comes to etiquette. :)

~Liza

[rowanmayfairs]

nope.. Never even read a regular etiquette book.. I think of the wedding planning books applied to more of the BIGGER budget weddings than mine :)

[*Diane*]

I was reared to believe that etiquette matters because it makes all of us feel more comfortable. There is a right and wrong in every situation. I won't let etiquette overrule what I feel is right but frankly, I have never run across a situation where that would happen. To answer your question, though, I don't own any etiquette books. I rely on internet research when I am unsure.

[~Tala~]

Nope, no ettiquette books for me. I feel as just being myself is enough to make everyone around me comfortable--I was brought up to be polite and treat people with respect...I think only real life can truly teach you that.

[nikkiana]

I don't have a book... I just tend to go with what common sense dictates. If I have a specific question on handle something, I might go to the Internet to see what would be proper etiquette wise...

That said, I've found that a lot of etiquette websites that I've visited really make me feel very ill at ease and I don't like frequenting them if I can help it.

[KathyandJer]

I don't have any books, but my mother does. I have relied on her more than a book though!

Also, I'll do research...or do what I believe is right in my situation :)

[JerAndKathy]

I don't - I just wait for the "you wanna what" look, and then I say..."Or maybe not, let's go with your idea instead". LoL

[*Tanya*]

I don't use etiquette books, Heather. I use you and Kirsten. :heee:

[Emily]

I don't use any book...I'm not a believer in "proper etiquette" who is anyone else to tell me how I am "supposed" to act...I just think everyone needs basic manners and they will be fine!

[Celeste]

:lol: at Tanya. Yes, I have a few of them. Like others said, they don't rule my life or dictate my behaviour. I use my own common sense first and choose my own actions. But they come in handy for particular situations where I want to make everybody involved with the event comfortable. For example, checking on appropriate attire for visiting a family during Shiva, or whether replies are required to sympathy notes.

[nikkiana]

:lol: at Tanya. Yes, I have a few of them. Like others said, they don't rule my life or dictate my behaviour. I use my own common sense first and choose my own actions. But they come in handy for particular situations where I want to make everybody involved with the event comfortable. For example, checking on appropriate attire for visiting a family during Shiva, or whether replies are required to sympathy notes.

All very good reasons for consulting an etiquette book!

I certainly haven't the foggiest clue what to wear to visit a family during Shiva (though I will also readily admit I wasn't entirely sure what Shiva meant but was relatively certain it was a term relating to Judiasm, and was quite surprised to learn when I looked it up on Wikipedia that it's also the name of a Hindu god.... and that Shiva in relating to Judiasm was an English-ized version of Shiv'ah).

[MrsAbi]

I haven't in the past, but since I started planning the wedding I've been reading military etiquette books. I can't wait to be an Army officer's wife and throw the dinner parties.

[Maria 05]

No I used Celeste (Kristen) and what other grus were on hand

[lizaanne]

I had to write a thank you note to a Catholic Bishop one time, he had sent me some books after speaking with him after a lecture he gave at my Church. I had no idea how to properly address him in writing, so my little old etiquette book came in VERY handy!

Better to be sure than not know and look like an idiot or a complete social dolt. :)

~Liza

[Maria 05]

Is a bishop Your Lordship? My lord Bishop? That one would have stumped me Lizaanne

[mswordwiz]

I do have a few, and of course, the resource of mum. There have been a few times lately, that I have had to dust them off and look for what is the proper etiquette for declining invitations so I did not look like a bozo.

[lizaanne]

Is a bishop Your Lordship? My lord Bishop? That one would have stumped me Lizaanne

The Most Reverand Robert Smith

~Liza

[Cindy]

I have an bride etiquette book that I purchased years ago when I was thinking I was getting married to my then BF. I'm not sure where I've stashed it, but as Maria put it, I've used the Internet or I've asked the mighty Celeste and others as well that have more knowledge than myself when I have had a question.

[Theresa]

I have several books. And I'm not sure I could live without them. I did sell one of my larger wedding etiquette books after the wedding. I just kept the small one because it had plenty of information now that I don't have to actually PLAN a wedding.

[smiles]

I don't have any ettiquite books. I've read a few from the library, and I use the internet for research if I'm not sure of something. Mostly I use common sense, and what works for me rather than following strict ettiquite guidelines.